The quiet power of ordinary stories

I’ve spent much of my working life listening to people’s stories. Not the polished versions we publish on LinkedIn or share across social media, but the complicated, often contradictory accounts of how we navigate the swirliness of the real world.

And whenever I have the privilege of a relative stranger sharing with me, I’m struck by the wisdom each of us carries, and how much we learn when we listen hard too. It’s why MPOWDER is, first and foremost, a community.

Earlier this week, listening to Michael Lewis discuss his new book Blockers at the Royal Festival Hall here in London, I was reminded of just how powerful this can be.

Lewis has made a career of finding extraordinary meaning in stories that others might have overlooked. What struck me most, though, wasn’t simply his talent for discovering them. It was his optimism about humanity, and his belief in the power of individuals to make a difference.

In a world where the news can feel relentlessly bleak, we need to remember the goodness in the world, and the impact each of us has on its direction of travel too.

It also got me thinking about what science tells us about stories, and why listening to each other matters, particularly in midlife.

Our brains are made for stories

When we hear a compelling story, something interesting happens in our brains.

Neuroscientists at Princeton University have explored a phenomenon known as neural coupling, where patterns of brain activity in a storyteller and listener become aligned during successful communication.¹

In their research, greater alignment was associated with better understanding of the story.

In other words, storytelling isn’t simply the transfer of information. It involves our brains working to understand and anticipate another person’s experience.

There is also evidence that stories can help us understand people whose lives look very different from our own.

A 2024 meta-analysis published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, drawing on 70 experiments, found that reading fiction produced small but significant cognitive benefits, specifically in empathy and our ability to understand other people’s mental states.²

The evidence suggests that engaging with other people’s perspectives can help us practise the art of understanding them.

And perhaps, in an increasingly divided world, that is something worth protecting.

Why being heard matters in midlife

For years, much of the conversation around women’s midlife health was dominated by what could be measured.

• Hormones.
• Symptoms.
• Weight.
• Sleep.
• Risk factors.

These measures are important. But they don’t tell the whole story.

They don’t tell us what it feels like to lose confidence in a meeting. To wake at 3am and face another working day bone tired. To care for ageing parents while managing teenage children, relationships and a job we no longer feel good enough for.

They don’t capture the possibilities that come with midlife too. The freedom, perspective, ambition and new beginnings that are just as much a part of this chapter.

This is where narrative research becomes so valuable.

A 2025 review of 12 qualitative menopause studies, exploring the experiences of women aged 45 to 60, found that lived experiences reveal important dimensions of midlife that symptom-focused research can miss.³

The stories included challenges, but also accounts of menopause as an opportunity for new beginnings and, in some communities, a period of growing status and wisdom.

More recent research has also highlighted how women from different cultural backgrounds can experience and understand menopause in markedly different ways. A University of Liverpool and Royal Holloway study with Black and Chinese-heritage women in North West England found that migration history, traditional beliefs and knowledge passed between generations all shape how women interpret this stage of life.⁴

These are insights we risk missing when we assume that one woman’s experience represents everyone’s.

For me, this is the real value of collecting stories.

Data can tell us what’s happening. Stories help us understand what it means.

And when we listen properly, those experiences can inform better research, better services and more relevant solutions.

The problem with extraordinary stories

There is something else I’ve been reflecting on too.

In the wellness world, we seem increasingly drawn towards extremes.

Extraordinary transformations. Incredible recoveries. People who have completely reinvented their bodies, minds and lives through extraordinary discipline.

And then there are the impossibly polished routines.

The 5am meditation, followed by cold-water immersion, a personal training session, an organic breakfast prepared from scratch and an hour of uninterrupted journaling.

Wonderful if you have the time, money and support to make it all happen.

Less helpful if you’re getting three children ready for school, caring for a parent, or simply trying to get through a difficult week.

The problem isn’t that these stories exist. It’s that they can become the benchmark against which we judge our own lives.

And in doing so, we overlook the enormous value in achievable, sustainable shifts that can make a big difference to our wellbeing too.

The friend who found a way to sleep better. The colleague who discovered a way to fit movement into her working day that you could try too. The woman who worked out how to make eating well less complicated, and shares her recipes for the week.

These aren’t stories that make headlines.

But they might be the ones that change somebody else’s Tuesday.

Small stories. Big ripples.

One of the ideas I took away from my evening with Michael Lewis was that we rarely know the full consequences of our actions.

Something we say. A kindness we offer. A piece of advice we pass along.

We may never see what happens next.

And I think the same can be true of the small things that make our everyday lives easier.

Here’s an example from my own life.

I’ve discovered that batch cooking protein and vegetables has made an enormous difference to how consistently I eat well.

Nothing revolutionary. Simply cooking extra chicken and a couple of trays of cruciferous vegetables at the weekend, keeping some portions ready to hand and freezing others for later in the week.

It means that when life gets busy, a nutritious meal doesn’t require quite so much thought, preparation or negotiation with myself.

It’s hardly the stuff of a bestselling wellness book.

But it’s made my life easier.

Most of us have a handful of these small discoveries that could be enormously helpful to someone else. We just may not realise it.

A thought to take into the week

So this week, I have a little invitation.

Instead of looking for another extraordinary transformation story, let’s start sharing more of the ordinary ones.

The small wins. The daily frustrations. The things we’ve worked out along the way.

Our goal? To embrace imperfection and find the solutions that work in the real world.

If you could pass on just one small thing that’s made your everyday life easier, healthier or happier, what would it be?

Tell a friend. Share it with someone who might need it. Send it to me at yourteam@mpowder.store.

Because sometimes the smallest things have the biggest ripple effects.

References

1. Stephens, Silbert and Hasson. Speaker–listener neural coupling underlies successful communication. PNAS, 2010.
   https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.1008662107
2. Wimmer and colleagues. Cognitive effects and correlates of reading fiction: two preregistered multilevel meta-analyses. Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 2024.
   https://doi.org/10.1037/xge0001583
3. Wood and colleagues. Women’s experiences and expectations during the menopause transition: a systematic qualitative narrative review. Health Promotion International, 2025.
   https://doi.org/10.1093/heapro/daaf005
4. University of Liverpool, Centre for Ageing and the Life Course. Menopause and ethnicity: lived experiences of Black and Chinese-heritage women, and Cultural Competency Toolkit for Menopause, 2026.
   https://news.liverpool.ac.uk/2026/06/15/new-toolkit-aims-to-improve-menopause-care-for-women-from-minority-ethnic-communities/